The Unseen Why: How I Learned to Trust God When I Don't Get a Say
The Flaw in Being Blameless
This is the start of my wrestling match. I chose the book of Job to begin this journey because, to be honest, it’s one of the most frustrating, terrifying, and ultimately important books in the Bible. It speaks directly to that moment I have (maybe you have to) look up and ask, "Why me?" The first few chapters of Job show a man who has done everything right. He is called "blameless and upright"—a righteous person whose life should hold all of God’s blessings. Yet, in a single chapter, Job loses his health, his family, his business, and his wealth. My first thought reading this section was pure outrage. God pointed Job out to Satan, essentially saying, "Go ahead, see what he does when it all goes wrong". I cannot even imagine how that feels! It reminds me of an innocent man being put in jail for something they didn't do. Job was minding his own business, living his life. And Job’s friends? They show up and deliver the worst advice in history! They believe that God rewards the good and punishes the bad. Therefore, they insist: Job, you must have done something really bad to suffer this much. Ask for forgiveness and God will restore you. But Job sticks to his honesty: I am righteous and I don't deserve this. God is acting unjustly.
The Question That Pissed Me Off
Job cried out to God, asking what he had done to deserve this. And in Chapter 38, God finally answers—but not with a word of comfort. My initial, gut reaction to God’s response was pure anger. It came off as God being an arrogant dictator demanding: “HOW DARE you question ME?” Honestly, I believe God should have simply given him a hug. I am a pediatric nurse and have always had an instinct to help and comfort. If I was in this situation where everything around me was just taken I would not want anything more than, I mean what can be said? Yet, I realize that in my own trials, I have had this same arrogance and anger. I have believed that God is like "a kid on a hill with a magnifying glass just burning us the ants". Job crosses this line too accusing God of being malicious, saying things like, "It is all one; therefore I say, He destroys both the blameless and the wicked" (Job 9:22). The question for us, the readers, is this: Why does God seem to skip the comfort and go straight to the cosmos lecture?
The Pilot and the Promise: Reframing Comfort
I think of being in a plane and there is turbulence in the air and the plane is shaking and making those weird noises. A child or even an adult is sitting next to me. I can see them crying, white knuckling the armrest, holding their breath, etc., showing obvious signs of distress. Instinctually I would hold out a hand for comfort, or offer an encouraging word because I know what it is like to be in a situation where you are uncomfortable and unfortunately cannot get out of it. I chose comfort first always. God's answer isn't addressing Job's pain; it’s addressing Job’s arrogance.
Here is the analogy that finally changed my perspective:
What I want (The "Hug"): I am small child on a turbulent flight. I want my parent (God) to hug me and say, "It's okay, sweetie, I feel your fear." This is a request for Empathy and Explanation.
What God gives (The "Cosmos Lecture"): God takes me to the cockpit and shows me the vast array of instruments and Pilot's certifications. He is saying: "I am the Pilot of your entire life and the whole universe."
God is challenging Job's competence to judge His actions. He asks Job about the foundations of the earth, the boundaries of the sea, and the nature of Behemoth and Leviathan. I learned that this isn’t a harsh lecture; it's an amazing display of endless knowledge and wisdom. The logic is: "If you cannot even explain the mechanics of a thunderstorm or the wild nature of a mountain goat, how can you presume to explain and judge the ways I govern the entire moral universe?"
The comfort of God’s knowledge, though less emotionally satisfying in the moment, is ultimately more reliable.
Stability: The comfort of God's power is the guarantee that the storm has a boundary. As Job 38:11 states: "Thus far shall you come, and no farther".
Faithfulness: Job feared God was cruel and unfair. The greatest comfort is knowing that the all-powerful God loves and knows Job. God's greatness guarantees His faithfulness.
The Book of Job pushed me to accept God's mystery and sovereignty first, so that when the comfort (the "hug") finally comes, it is resting on the foundation of an all-wise and all-powerful God. When I read God's cosmic questions, I should not hear a yell but a pledge of competence. "The one who can harness the ocean can certainly see me through this small life".
